It Is Always the Someone Else
By Scott Shaw
Have ever noticed that in life everything will be going along fine and then someone comes into your realm of existence and messes everything up? I mean, this can come at you from all kinds of angles. It can be someone new in the work place or at school, someone who is rude moving in next door to you, someone sitting down next to you and being inconsiderate at a restaurant or in the movie theater, someone telling lies about you on the internet, someone not paying attention and running their car into yours, on up to the larger, more calculated, scale, it can be someone committing a crime against you, and the list goes on… The one primary element of this is that at some point your life will be going along fine and then someone new will come into it, uninvited, and ruined everything.
This has happened to all of us. Hopefully it hasn’t happened to you too much. But, once it has occurred, your life is forever altered. These invasive events can be large or they can be small but it is almost unimportant to the definition of their scale, for once it is done it is done and everything has changed.
Life is lived in moments. Each moment defines itself. Your moment can be happy or it can be sad. But, you string these moments together and that equals a lifetime — your lifetime.
For most of us, we try to be nice to people; we try to be considered and caring. We try to help and to not hurt anyone. But, not everyone is like that. There are some inconsiderate, intolerant, judgmental, and intentionally hurtful people out there. They may each have a proclaimed motivation for doing what they do and behaving in the manner they behave, but at the end of the day all that behavior does is hurt other people.
Whenever any of these invasive people enter our life we look for a way out. Whether this is accomplished by simply getting up and leaving the establishment, trying to find a new job or a better place to live, or fixing what they have broken, the quest is on. Sometimes, however, it is not that easy as this interpersonal attack may take place in a manner that is hard to defend against. Then, we are left damned by circumstance for an extended period of time.
Do the people who instigate these type of life events care? Do they say, “Sorry?” Probably not. They may make excuses; they may have self-defined justifications but that is as far as it will go as they are so locked into the selfishness of their own mindset that they do not even acknowledge or care about the damage they have created.
Look to your life. Think about it. Who has come into your life and truly damaged it? …Whether this damage was only in a moment or over an extended period of time, how did it feel and how did it affect your overall existence? Now, think about how did you deal with that person, that situation, and that experience? Once you have defined these factors; contemplate, through the perspective of time, how should you have dealt with it? Should you have done something differently? Or, did you take the best actions you should/could have taken in that moment? From this mental preparation and contemplation, you may be able to become more functionally aware and be able to better deal with these type of life situation and these type of people in the future.
The main thing to realize is that fist-to-fist, verbal or physical combat, is rarely the right thing to do. Sure, you may be able to win via that method but to engage this type of person only leads to further consequences instigated by their negative actions. Thus, by entering into battle with them, based upon what they have incited, may come to not only define your moment but your future, as well.
At the root/at the heart of our life is doing good things. If we want to live a good life, if we want to be remembered in a positive manner, if we want to truly make a positive contribution to the world around us, then everything we do we must initially take others into consideration. We must think about the world around us first, before we think about ourselves. This is true humility. This is true spirituality.
In life, we will each encounter people who will negatively force their way into our sphere of existence and mess up our moment. Hopefully, these forced interactions will be few and far between. Hopefully, they will not damage our life too much. But, they will occur. Understanding this, you must prepare yourself both physically and mentally to know how to react when these situations do take place. You must be more than the person who does not think of others.
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