The Scott Shaw Blog Be Positive

How Can I Care About Anyone Else?

As we are coming to the end of this yuletide season… …Yuletide, I always thought that was a funny word…
 
Anyway, as we are coming to the end of this Christmas/Hanukkah season, I believe we have all encountered the desire of desire of those wanting certain things and us wanting to give certain things. I guess the larger your family, the more complicated it gets. But, large or small, we all see and hear stories of the holiday season and people buying and spending, and maybe spending too much to make other people happy.
 
Making other people happy is a good thing, right? Giving is a good thing, right? But, most/many people simply want. Even those who give, why are they giving? Because they want a reaction.
 
All around us we see people doing what they are doing but why are they doing it? Are they doing it to make the All and the Everything of Reality better? Yes, for some that is their motivation. But, for others (for most) it is all about them. No matter how many lies they tell themselves and others about why they are giving, mostly they give is to get what they want; whether this be a feeling, gifts, admiration, fame, sex, whatever. Few people live in a space of Pure Consciousness where they give to give and want nothing in return.
 
How about you? Did you get what you wanted this holiday season? Did you give what you wanted this season? And mostly, why did you give or get anything?
 
I’m not going to name a name, as that’s not cool, but there’s this one Reality TV star whose husband got into a big legal bind due to the fact he was taking money from his law firm and absconding with money from his client’s cases his firm had won to finance his and his wife’s lavish lifestyle and give her a platform to rise to the top of the fame game. At one point in the show, she brutally explains that she doesn’t care about anyone but herself. “What I’m telling you, I don’t give a fuck about anybody else but me,” she exclaims. Even her castmates, who are no saints, couldn’t believe they heard that coming out of her mouth. Later, on another episode, she questions her shrink, what is empathy and how can I get that? It was all just a WOW. How could anyone be like that? But, people are like that are all around us. Most are just not so vocal, however, broadcasting their true thoughts and feelings on TV.
 
I think for most of us, we do care. Yeah, there’s a lot of sociopaths and hypocrites and liars and whatever else you want to call them out there, but most people at least care about the people they care about. And, some do care about the grander whole. Where do you find yourself in this equation? And, are you honest with yourself about your answer?
 
The Christmas/Hanukkah season brings giving into focus. We want to give to those we care about.
 
Most giving is small, it’s doable. The bigger GIVE is the problem. Even people, like the aforementioned Reality TV Star, who has the ability to do good things, via her platform, got herself into all kinds of a mess by only thinking about herself and not the grander whole of reality. And, here lies the problem. Sure, there’s a million reason for you to go after getting what you want but in that getting where is the giving? If you do get, what do/did you give? And, kind of like that gift you got that you never really wanted, are you truly giving what that someone else wants or needs?
 
If you base your life on taking, it will end badly. It’s as simple as that. No matter what lies you tell yourself, if all you do is for you, that eventually equals nothing but disaster.
 
Giving is a whole other issue, however. If you are giving what they don’t want or need, is that giving at all?
 
The answer to all of this is to listen and to understanding. …To study the reality of your reality and to truthfully understand the reality of the person or persons you are interacting with.

Giving is always better than taking. But, giving becomes nothing more than nothing if you are not providing the receiver with that something that will truly make their all and their everything better. …Not defined simply by your judgement, or even their judgement, but by the reality of the reality.
 
Study the science of giving. It may change your and everyone else’s life for the better.