Whenever I go and get my yearly physical from my doctor, he always asks, “How well do you sleep?” My answer is always the same, “Sleep, what’s that?”
 
I remember way back in the day, I used to love to sleep. If he (or she), as my doctor was a female back then, if they would ask that question, I would have a very different answer.
 
Now, I sleep very little. That’s not really the way I want it to be. That’s just the way it is.
 
You know, sleep is kind of like life. You check out for a time, and, via your dreams you live a completely different reality. But then, you wake up, and your reality is your reality and what was alive in your dreams is gone. Then what? Which one was really real?
 
I mean, take a look at your life… Remember the people you used to know. I would imagine that some of them are still in your life. But, how many people did you know, once upon a time, that you no longer know. Were they just a dream?
 
Me, I think about all of the people that I knew, once upon a time, that I haven’t heard from in years. Some were family, some were friends. But, where are they now? Why haven’t they called? Or, more importantly, why haven’t I called them?
 
Yes, yes, many of them have passed on from this life. But, that’s an entirely different subject.
 
We are all like this, yes? People enter and then fade from our life. But, why? Why is that the destiny of human interactive reality?
 
I got to thinking about this when this guy I know sent me a copy of this movie I did in Hong Kong a million years ago. He’s one of those real Hong Kong Cinema fanatics. Aren’t we all? But, he’s one who proclaims the fact. Anyway, he was watching this obscure piece of Hong Kong Cinema, saw me in it, and sent the movie my direction. Thanks!
 
I had long ago put that movie out of mind. The thing about Hong Kong Cinema, especially when you’re a Westerner working there, is that the powers-that-be don’t really care about you. So, they rarely give you screen credit. If they do, as was the case with this film, they never seem to use your real name. I don’t know why that is? I imagine they have a reason for it. But, what that reason is, I will, most probably, never know. And, this has happened to a lot of people, not just me. Anyway, I realized a long time ago, that was not good for building a budding career. So, why bother.
 
But, with the arrival of that footage, I was sent down memory lane. In that film, I had done a big scene in a bar, one on an apartment set, and a fight on the street.
 
In viewing the footage, it got me to thinking about the people I worked with. A few of them, we got to be (kinda) friends. I remember we went and got drunk a few times in Central and stuff like that. I knew them then. And yes, that was a long-long time ago. But, we lost touch and I have no idea what happened to them.
 
How many people that were in your life are like that? You knew them, and now you didn’t.
 
I’m not one of those people who lives for nostalgia. In fact, I’m just the opposite. I’m very Here and Now. I never look back and wonder, “What if…”  But, the fact of the fact is, people were in my life and then they were not. Why?
 
Again, I’m not one of those who wishes to reach back into my past and reconnect. In fact, when people have done that to me, sometimes it was nice, sometimes it wasn’t, but what once was, was never again. And, I think that is what people who reach out from the past hope to find. They wish/want to relive what once was. But, times change, people change. We are not who we used to be. Thus, we can never be THAT again. At best, we may find something new in this Here, founded upon that what once was. But, today is not yesterday.
 
So, what am I saying here? I guess, I’m wondering that too?
 
But, just a few moments ago, I took a pause from writing this piece, and I dozed off sitting here in my chair. As it’s very late at night. I started to dream. The dream was so vivid. So lived. In that dream, I was interacting with people. I knew them. They knew me. But, I woke up and they were gone. What happened to them?