“Rock in the Rice,” When I say that it kind of makes me want to make the devil horns with my hand. You know, the heavy metal style hand gesture.
 
But, that's not really what this piece is about.
 
To tell the story… I was eating in this restaurant maybe six or eight months ago. I was chewing along, enjoying the meal, when, all of a sudden, I bit into something. BAM! I had bitten into a rock. Ouch!!!
 
You probably know about this, but every now and then, when you're eating, particularly white rice, they'll be rocks in it. Yes, that's due to the fact that the rice wasn't processed fully and/or correctly… …Or, the people who were preparing it, just didn't care enough to care. But, whatever the causation factor, every now and then, there'll be a rock in the rice.
 
I remember the first time that I experienced this. I was eating at this really good vegetarian chili place over on Montana Ave. in Santa Monica, back in the later '70s. The place was really good. I really enjoyed their food there. They didn't serve the alcohol, but if you wanted to, you could go to the liquor store next door and grab a brew. With this, you could enjoy your chili with a beer. I would always go to the liquor store, prior to eating the chili, and grab me my favorite beer at the time, St. Pauli Girl.
 
Anyway/and in any case, I was enjoying my chilly there one day and BAM I bit into a rock. I spoke to the owner about it, and she apologetically told me, “That just happened sometimes…” Back then, I guess because I was still young, and my teeth were really strong, it didn't really do any long-lasting damage. It did hurt. But, it didn't break my teeth or anything
 
Here I am, four or five decades later, however, and biting into a rock did my teeth no good. It actually totally broke one of my teeth. I remember spinning it out in my hand. The rock and the part of my tooth. Not good!
 
A lot of people have asked me, why didn't I sue the restaurant? Or, why don't I sue the restaurant? I guess that's just not who I am. I mean, I tell you, if I were to sue everybody who had wronged me in my life, I don't know if I'd be a rich man, but I know my lawyer would be. As, they're the ones who make all the money from those situations. But, to answer any of your current inquiries, no I didn't sue the restaurant, nor do I plan to.
 
Anyway, I get to my dentist ASAP. She sends me over to a specialist. They do a root canal on the tooth, and all of that sort of junk. …Trying to save the tooth.
 
I guess I should interject here, the thing is, for whatever reason, and I have no explanation for it, I have really good teeth. I remember my mother had all kinds of problems with her teeth. My father died too young for me to really know about what was going on with him. But, as far as I go, I haven't even had a cavity in over twenty years. Amazing! So, for me to have a tooth problem, is not only very upsetting, it is an entirely new experience for me.
 
In any case, they did the root canal, but the tooth continued to bother me. For the past or six or eight months, every time I ate anything, the tooth basically hurt.
 
Me, I go back into the specialist, they re-X-ray it;  do a whole three-sixty-things with some weird sort of machine doing this massive X-ray of my mouth, and they come back with the conclusion that the root of the tooth has a crack. It has to be removed. Damn it!
 
So, I make an appointment with another specialist. I go to have the tooth extracted, have a bone graft put in, so when it heals in like six months, I can have an implant put in.
 
This only happened a couple of days ago, so I can’t really eat very comfortably yet. And, stuff like that. No chips or popcorn or anything. No fun!  At least not yet. I imagine many of you out there may have had a similar experience.
 
The moral of the story… Think about it… How many times in life are we, (you and I), fucked over by someone or something that we never wanted to encounter. …Something that we never wanted to happen to our life. Yet, it did.
 
Many times, these circumstances, are brought about by the unconscious, uncaring, or even intentionally hurtful actions of someone else. …People who do not care enough to care that they did not clean the rocks out of the rice. Then what? Answer: It is only us that is left to deal with the consequences. Us, that must pick up the pieces.
 
I say, as I always say, never hurt anybody. I say, as I always say, live your life as consciously as possible so you will never hurt anyone.  
 
But, after that, all you can do is to endure the pain. Get that tooth pulled. Move on with your life as best as you can. Because, at the end of the day, you will forever be the only one who is truly experiencing your pain.