The Scott Shaw Blog Be Positive

The Projected You

Each person wishes to find and associate with people of like-mind. For some, this is wholly defined by where one was born and where one finds themselves in life. For them, life and finding friends and associates is easy. They are born into a tribe and a culture where they feel very comfortable. Thus, they go out to a world surrounded by those whom they meet and blend with in a very natural manner.
For others, the path to life associations, friendships, and loves is not that easy. Maybe they hold a different mindset and possess a different set of idealized images than do their family or the community that surrounds them. With this, they must find a way to move outwards and onwards to seek those that they will feel the most comfortable with.
In some cases, this is not possible, however. That person, who views life differently, sometimes must force themselves to blend into the world around them and associate with those of a different mind. This is never easy. Some simply lie to themselves about their true inner feelings in order to become part of the pack. Whatever the case, each human being must move their way outwards and into the world and the realities of life with the hope that they will meet those, other, people that will complete their life experience and hopefully cause them to live a rich and fulfilled life.
Life is defined by availability. For some, when a person meets another person, and finds something appealing in them, they choose to form a union. Occasionally, though this individual may be drawn to that other person, in whatever form that may take, they find them to be living a different mindset or lifestyle than their own. From this, some are motivated to try and change that person.
This attempt at change can take on many forms. It some cases, it may be just words or suggestions. In other cases, it may be more forceful. Whatever the method, what is occurring is that one person is attempting to shape and redefine the other individual to more suitably fit what they believe to be a superior life or lifestyle.
Some people are not like this, however. They let a person be who they are. They accept them for whatever they think and feel.
Few are like that, however. Most want other people to be as close to them and mirror their own mindset as possible. From this, though sometimes people come to form a union, of some sort, that union is eventually dissolved due to the hope of one person to live a certain lifestyle defined by a specific set of principles, one that the other person will not or cannot adhere to.  
Where do you find yourself in this pattern of life? How do you react to people of a different set of life standards and/or beliefs?  Do you try to change them in order that they more closely mimic what you think, believe, feel, and hope to project to the world? Or, do you simply let them be as they are?
It seems that when one is young they are both more accepting of other people and their lifestyles, as well as being more prone to hoped for change in that other individual. This is obviously based upon a person’s personality, what they have previously encountered in life, and how they were treaded by others, who were different from them. The fact is, people are trained in how to behave and how to react to others by their family, friends, society, and culture. No person is wholly created by themselves.
This being said, there are two predominate forms of instigating change in another individual. The first, is forced. This is when one person specifically dedicates that another individual becomes something different than they already are. The second, and more passive method, is via example. With this, one person influences another through no-direct communication. The other individual simply witnesses something in that person that they like, admire, or wish to imitate, and they instigate a change within themselves.   
In life, we all evolve. Or, at least we should evolve into became the best version of ourselves. Some people never change, however. They are firm in who and what they are, and they only wish to associate with people that are just like them.

By whatever means, we all become what we become. For some, this is via influence. For others, this is via choice. For some, they are forced into a pattern of life and lifestyle. Whatever the case, we have all become what we have become.
Right here, right now, take a look at yourself. Define yourself. Be Very-Very Honest. Who are you? What are you? Why are you? What caused you to become what you have become?
Really take some time to think this out.
Once you have, turn it around. Think about the other people in your life. Who are they? What are they? Why are they? What caused them to become what they have become? But, most importantly, what role did you play in create the person they have become?
In life, you may be living what you believe you created. In life, you may be living what someone else created for you.  If you do not clearly know the answer to who, what, and why you are as you are, you can never truly know yourself. If you do not clearly know the answer to why those people who are close to you have become who and what they are, then you do not know them at all.
Did you create yourself? Did you create someone else?  
If you created yourself, then you are true person. If, on the other hand, you created someone else, then you are nothing more than a puppet master. If you are a puppet master, you are one-hundred percent responsible for the karma of that other person, as they are not whom they were truly meant to become.
Think about it.